Struggling with PORN?

It seems harmless to just look at magazines, watch videos or download mpegs and jpegs. After all, there’s a lot of it in our culture, and especially on the Internet. How could it hurt someone

Pornography isn’t just “entertainment” – it’s also a stimulant. It affects you physically, mentally and emotionally. You might like the pleasure you get while viewing it and want to see more of it. If you think about it, that doesn’t sound any different than someone who has found drinking or drugs fun.

If you have used it repeatedly, there is a strong chance it could affect you. You might feel like you are doing something wrong. You might feel like you have a secret, and don’t want anyone else to know what you‘re doing. If you are viewing it with a group of friends, you might even wonder if one of them would “turn you in.”

See if you can answer “yes” to any of these questions:

  1. Do I plan to go online for only a few minutes, but on several occasions, stay on the computer much longer, especially when I visit porn sites?
  2. Do I think a lot about when I can get online next, which websites I can go to, where I can watch a video, or how I am going to pay for accessing a site?
  3. Do I become restless or irritable if I cannot view porn?
  4. Do I try to quit, and even manage to avoid doing it for a while, but end up doing it again?
  5. Do I watch porn when I should do homework, be with my friends or complete household chores?
  6. Do I need to view more intense (or “hardcore”) images or view porn more often to feel satisfied?
  7. Have I stopped doing things that are either fun or important to me so I can spend more time viewing porn?
  8. Have I ever stolen a credit card to pay for my access? Have I planned to make sure that I can watch porn without being disturbed?
  9. Even if I can see that it has repeatedly hurt me socially, financially, or in some other way, I still view porn.

All of these are signs that you are becoming addicted to porn. And many people can tell you how any addiction can take over your life even before you see that you have a problem.

Even though this kind of addiction sounds harmless, long-term porn use can affect people in many ways.

Sometimes, these people can only respond to the fantasy not the reality, so it can actually keep you from having sex. Even if they are married, they might not be able to be aroused by their spouses, because they can only be excited by the images.

People who use porn for a long time sometimes believe that these images show what relationships are all about. They might see other people as objects, to be used for one’s gratification.

In extreme cases, someone who is addicted could crave more and more extreme images, leading them to images that intermingle sex with violence (called sadomachistic images). This is very unhealthy. According to the FBI, one of the most common traits shared by violent serial criminals is their interest in sexual and sadomachistic images.

If you think that you have a problem, talk to your parents or another trusted adult, someone whom you know will not judge you.

If you are part of a group that meets to watch it or share it in some other way, be prepared – other group members may try to pressure you into remaining involved or keeping quiet.

You might feel embarrassed to even think about revealing it, but it takes a lot of support for someone to “kick the habit” – no matter what that habit might be. And you can get that support by asking for it.

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